This is most evident in Jacob's new favorite toy, Elmo knows your name. Drew got this elmo for his first birthday from his wonderful Aunt Amber, who programmed it for us with Drew's name, likes and dislikes... and so forth. Drew never really got into it, or Elmo for that matter. Flash forward 4 years.... and suddenly this neglected toy is Jacob's favorite toy. The boy can't stop playing with it, which was great, except for one thing.
Elmo kept calling him Drew.
Jacob was okay with Elmo's strange fixation with talking about what Drew likes, and who he loves Elmo told Jacob that Elmo loves Mommy, and Jacob looked at me like I was the coolest person ever, because, gasp, I know Elmo! And Elmo loves me! Elmo also loves Drew, Daddy, Grandma, Mac and Cheese, but no Jacob. In a word, this was just sad. Of course, being the organized Mom that I am, I spent an hour looking for the disc to reprogram Elmo to Love Jacob before I realized I must have tossed it or it was in the depths of the basement. Thankfully, Mattel has a dowload available on their website. I managed to find the USB cable (thank goodness I never throw those away, even though I curse myself whenever I am trying to navigate a drawer full of cords).
Next I had to find a way to sneak Elmo away from Jacob's grasp. I waited until I heard Elmo stop talking in his room. I tiptoed in and grabbed Elmo quickly, and backed away from the crib slowly with him behind my back, praying I would not bump him against something.
That is how much of the silly little post I had typed last night and then....
....I try and download Jacob's name onto Elmo. Instead of working, it makes Elmo malfunction. Apparently this was an issue with this toy that I never encountered because my sister programmed it. Now instead of having a toy Jacob loves that calls him Drew and sings songs to him, Jacob has a silent Elmo doll. This would be fine if he wasn't expecting Elmo to sing and talk to him. Normally, I don't get all bent out of shape over a broken toy, but the way that boy loved and got so much joy out of that toy, well it has made me completely irrational.
The worst part is that there is no compareable replacement, no online help, no patch, no nothing. How can I explain this to a two year old? How does Fisher Price expect people to deal with this? Thanks for leaving me hanging, asshats! It's one thing if he never had the toy, but to have it and love it for a week and then poof, it's gone? Well, it did not go over well tonight when he cried non-stop for Elmo to sing to him and I had to tell him he couldn't, and realize it was my fault and I broke it. Moms are supposed to fix things, not break them.
I don't know if it's stress or not feeling well or plain exhaustion at trying to do a million things at once, but I am getting to be ridiculously stressed out about this mess. Let's not mention the fact that I have spent over 5 hours trying to fix the stupid doll, because it only gives me another reason to cry.
Man, I think I need a Vacation. Even a Staycation would do right now. When Elmo almost sends me over the edge it's time to get away.
Thanks for letting me vent. I needed it. Also, Fisher Price? You are on notice along with Daylight Savings Time. I'm boycotting you for Christmas. So- there- feel the burn of my $39.99.
