July 9, 2009

Exiled Into Pop Culture Oblivion

I don't really watch or read any gossip magazines, I try to stay away from all the gossip magazines aside from reviews of shows and movies and information about shows I like. Still, certain things have infiltrated my world, and I would like them to go away. I would like to call this the "Exiled into Pop Culture Oblivion". Please people, make them stop! Here are my top ten things that I wish to never hear of again:

1. Perez Hilton: Dude, as if you weren't annoying enough already.
You have to go and call someone else a gay slur to "piss them off". This is not the way to show tolerance. I'm not asking you to be a spokesperson for gay rights, but I am asking you not to further perpetuate this slur.

2. Chris Brown: Not even gracing you with a picture with this one. I think this is self explanatory. Moving on....

3. Jennifer Aniston's Love Life: No, not Jennifer Aniston. Of course I love Jennifer Aniston. She's adorable! But I never want to hear another word about her love life. Never. I don't care that she went out on a date with Vince Vaughan er, John Mayer, er Bradley Cooper, and it was fun. I just don't give a rat's ass, and I really don't think her and Brad are having late night meetings behind Angelina's back, either.

4.Michael Jackson Songs: Okay, yes, it's sad he died, but guess what? I hadn't listened to his music in about 10 years; neither had anyone else. Give it a rest DJ's.... try to limit yourselves to 10 MJ songs per night, m'kay?

5. Two name combos for couples: Brangelina, Bennifer... why do people think that is fun or clever? If I heard someone using these in real life seriously, I might feel compelled to slap them. For their own good, of course.

6. Jon and Kate: This is sad, people, that people's lives and worse yet, children's lives are being ruined by fame and we are encouraging it by watching. Turn the TV show off, let the ratings slide and let those poor children have a break. Why aren't we holding executives at TLC accountable for letting this monstrosity go on for as long as it has?

7. The Hills and the Real World: Seriously MTV, stop pretending that these shows are real. Own up to the fakeness like Vh1 has. (I can't help it but I heart Rock of Love. At least it owns up to it's own trampiness campiness.)

8. Lady Gaga: Seriously WTF Lady Gaga? I know you think that you are "cutting edge" and avant garde with this getup, but really you are just coming across as misogynistic.

9. MTV: You are called Music Television, yet I have not seen a video on your channel for years! Why don't you just change your name to SRTV (scripted "reality" television)?

And finally, last but not least.....

10. Elmo: Darn Elmo, you are so over played that my little boy thinks everything RED is Elmo. I think you must have some sort of hypnosis in you vocal cords designed for children 2 and under. It's just wrong how much they love you!

Whew! Now that I got THAT off of my chest it's your turn. What things would you like to see disappear out of our pop culture lexicon?

Check back to see if I commented on your comment, I'd love to hear what's bugging you!


  1. No, not Elmo! I like to listen to puppets that refer to themselves in the third person :D

    What would I want eliminated? reality shows where the whole basis is to watch other people win stuff. Who gives a crap! It's not like I'm winning the stuff (Pardon me for thinking out loud ;-) here)

  2. THANK YOU FOR MENTIONING ELMO!!! He singlehandedly ruined Sesame Street for me, especially when he eclipsed Big Bird as the symbol for all things Sesame Street!!!!!!

    And Kitten HATES how Elmo constantly refers to himself in the third person! Kitten absolutely HATES that!!!

    Oh, and what else would I want eliminated? ALL REALITY TELEVISION. Shows like Big Brother and Survivor really bring out the worst in people.

  3. Perez has been a victim of his own celebrity "in his head".

    John and Kate need to make their own decision to be out of the publi eye no matter what the producers think.

    I LOVE The Hills - I know it's fake, but can't get enough.

  4. I have no idea who Perez Hilton is, or I'd join you on that band wagon.

    Jon and Kate: Total agreement here. Those kids are suffering for the parent's 15 minute claim to fame...and it's all being filmed...it will never go away. I can see how a 4/5 year old can be oblivious...but the older girls? Media has no shame.

    When you said SRTV I thought it stood for stupid reality TV.

    My addition to your Michael Jackson. OH MY GOSH ENOUGH! And leave the kids out of it. He's dead. They are grieving. Why are you adding "paternity" issues to their grief. What is it about the media and their need to target the grief of kids in order to boost their ratings...Heck, any grief. And...why does grief sell? Why are people so keen to glue themselves to the screen/magazine/newspaper in order to see someone break down and surrender to total grief.

    I don't get it.

  5. we hate so much of the same things!
    Elmo is at the top of my list. Anyone on Sesame Street who I didn't grow up with is totally not all that cool, but he really takes the cake.

    What is it about him that draws the kiddies in? I asked my Jacob, and he says he loves him best because he is red. I asked him if Elmo was blue if he would still love him. Jake said no, that if he liked blue he would love Cookie Monster best.

    I don't get it.

  6. AWESOME!!!! I would like many of the same things exiled. At the top of my list though would be the Today show feature: "Everyone has a story..." where Kathy Lee writes a song about some tragedy in their life and then someone comes in to sing it live to the featured person. UNCOMFORTABLE.

    Thanks for the laugh!

  7. You pretty much took all the ones I would say ... though I must admit, when I hear a Lady Gaga song (without knowing that it is by her) I'm always like "I really like this song." And that Jon & Kate -- they must go away.

    Also, I would like to eliminate anyting about the Olsen Twins and Lindsay Lohan.

  8. I agree with the vast majority of these.

    I do kinda understand the splash of Michael Jackson mania, just because it's part of society's way of collectively dealing with a situation that took them by surprise.

    Elmo is terribly annoying and should be turned into bright red stew.

    The only thing I know about Jon & Kate is that Kate was extremely annoying. (Maybe she could trade places with Elmo!)

  9. Carma- Yes those reality shows are just so depressing!

    Kitten- You are cracking Janna up! Janna LOVES this comment!

    Julia- I used to as well, and then I had to cut myself off!

    Alex- Oh, I think Stupid Reality TV and Scripted reality TV are interchangable.

    Lora- You can't argue with Jake's logic there.

    Stiletto Mom- That sounds absolutely wretched. I am so glad I have never had to see that.

    Jenners- I totally know what you mean about Lady Gaga. I like it, then curse myself for liking it! And Lindsay Lohan would be #11 on my list.

    Janna- Hey another Janna! Yeah, I get the mania too, it just annoys me, especially when it's all I hear on the radio.



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