I am missing out.
I have been missing writing posts, checking up with friends, and reading blogs. I've been missing it tremendously. Honestly I just don't have any time or energy to even think up anything witty or clever to say. That makes me sad. My job is kind of sucking the life out of me.
I miss me.
It's been really hard. I can't really find much joy in anything right now. I have a few moments with the family, but I am so all consumed by my job and thoughts of my job, I can't concentrate on anything outside of that right now. I have not been a good Mom. I've barely been an "okay" Mom, and I've been a nonexistent Wife. I've been a selfish Friend. I've been a bitchy Daughter*. Which only means one thing...
I've been an asshat of a Blogger.
I'm sorry, I hate these whiny posts too. I just want people to understand why I've been away. I don't want to be away, but I definitely don't want to be such a damn whiner in every post. So I'm going to try... try and get back to that happy place, at least here. This blog can be my corner of happy. I don't normally need any cheerleaders rooting me on... but if you want to root, it might help.
For now... I will have to come up with my little bit of happy. A reminder:
Sometimes I forget I have a lot to be happy about. Silver lining, right? I'm working on it.
* I will say I have been a good sister, merely for the fact that my sister and I can commiserate together.