Stressimessiness

So, I know I have been gone a while. It's been a crazy couple of weeks and I have been so wrapped up in the stressimessiness (my new word) of it for a while, it's been hard to see anything else. To start:

I'm officially unemployed, and now am a stay at home mom, unless by some miracle I find a job that's flexible and pays me as much or more as my last job.

I'm trying (rather unsuccessfully) to work on our house in the hopes that we can sell it next year. So far I have gotten nothing done because-

Jacob is not reacting well to all of these changes and to being a 3 year old in general.

He is driving. me. slowly. insane. I cannot take any more. What have I gotten myself into? I have talked to his teachers, and seen him around others, and it seems that I am getting the worst treatment.

He doesn't listen to me at all and he doesn't care. He's faced every kind of consequence a little boy could face, and it doesn't matter to him. It's awful, it's time-consuming, and it's tearing me apart.

Most of the time, while I may love him, I don't like him, not even a little bit, right now. I feel terrible about this. Also- there are these moments when he is still so sweet and they make everything else seem that much worse.

Where's my little guy? I miss him so much. he's been tough for a while now, but this is ridiculous. Drew was tough at 3 and turned into this amazing, caring little guy at 4, and I am hoping Jacob does the same. His 4th birthday is only 4 days away. Let's keep our fingers crossed, shall we?

Also, any suggestions would be very welcome right now.