July 13, 2007

The Elephant in the room

Has anyone heard about this weight loss drug called Alli, I think? Supposedly it makes you have really bad diarrhea if you eat fatty foods. That's what it does. Apparently it is THE new diet drug, like metabolife 10 years ago. How nasty is that? Anyway, I was thinking after the baby and breastfeeding, I might use it. I'd rather risk getting diarrhea all the time than be this weight anymore. I can't stand the thought of gaining more weight. For me it is the WORST part of being pregnant. For someone who has had weight and eating issues all my life, it is like a nightmare to me to have to sit and watch myself get big. The funny thing is, for as much weight as I have gained already (if you must know, ahem, 25 lbs) I haven't ate that much differently than normal. I mean last time I was like Janna the hut, eating all in sight. Now I try to be better.... with minimal results to show for it. How annoying. No one even talks about how monstrously large I have gotten. It's the elephant in the room no one talks about, except that the elephant is.... me. And I have 14 weeks left! All this time to get bigger, with no way of stopping it!

I have to remind myself that it is worth it.... and it will be in 14 weeks. I can't wait to meet my little man. THEN I can start playing russian roulette with my bowels.

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