December 19, 2009

Cookied out!

So today has been a quiet day on the blog front. Quiet days make me nervous. It makes me think you are all ready for my cookie stories... no? Well too bad, I like my asshat stories, so here we go....

I've been way ahead of schedule on all of Christmas tasks this year. The house was decorated the weekend after Thanksgiving, I've been shopping since Fall, and you all saw how awesome my Christmas cards turned out. So this year I decided to bake Christmas cookies. No biggie right? I am not a baker though. Hell, I'm barely able to stand cooking. I am not fond of cooking and my kitchen is not one that calls spend lots of time in me, I ahm so pretty. It is a fugly kitchen to the nth degree. I have counters that are never clean, no matter how many times I wash them, the cupboard hinges are all breaking, and the floor is white tile therefore perpetually dirty.

Still, I decided to trudge through. Here is the list of cookies I wanted to make:

Magic Cookie Bars
Skill level: Easy

These were pretty easy, however I added too much chocolate. Drew wanted to know if these cookies were actually magic. Nope, but the kids seemed to think they gave them super powers. Drew transformed into a duck and began quacking through the house. Jacob gained the power of SUPERSPEED and ran laps around the house. I'm sure this was due to the "magic" and not the extra chocolate that was added.

Tri Cornered Cream Cheese jelly things (Maybe not technical name, but I'm lazy so live with it!)
Skill level: Oh my Freakin' god I never want to make these again.

These took me three and half hours to make. Towards the end I just ate a big gob of dough so I wouldn't have to shape another cookie. Of course Mr. B loves them and wants more to make more *SOB*.

Fudgy Bon Bons
Skill Level: Meh- not too bad! Messy though.

I made these for the name only. Drew was able to help peel the Hershey's kisses that go in the middle of these (Jacob helped by handing the kisses to Drew, it was a regular assembly line), and the kids love them.

Sugar Cookies
Skill Level: Ridiculous amounts of work, for realsies.

It's a good thing Christmas only comes once a year because mah God do these things take a long time to make. I hate any recipe that calls for a rolling pin. It is not my forte. Somehow we manged to get about 30 usable cookies and we frosted them. Any ill feelings that I had toward the cookie making process were forgotten when Drew began frosting. Not only did he have a great time (he called himself "the Frosting King") but he had a little secret for me midway through the cookies.

"Mommy, I love you." He whispered.

I think the sugar cookies were a good note to end on. The biggest pain in the ass with the biggest payoff. . I don't do this for me, I do it for them. If I carried them in my belly for 9 months I guess 15 hours of baking is small potatoes And they loved it. The baking cookies, not the belly thing, although the probably loved that, too.

So those of you that made it through a post about sugar cookies, congratulations! Now please don't hit the unsubscribe button.


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